Archive | June, 2013

My birth and how prepared for it.

27 Jun

I’ve had hundreds of emails, tweets, Facebook messages asking about my labour whether i did hypno birth or meditation the answer was no. So I thought I would run through the whole process of exactly what I did.

My story began as soon as I found out I was pregnant, I knew that I had to get my mind and body aligned so that they were completely in tune and both working in the right direction.

I started the research of child birth and read every possible bit of literature in relation to a good birth, I gathered all the information and made my own assessment and came up with this,
I believe we were created by God and put on this earth to populate it, every aspect of our body was designed to make this process happen, from the fact that women were designed with a womb, ovaries and breasts, everything you need to carry and care for a new life, if this was the case then our bodies are made to cope, I knew what I needed to do and I trusted the mechanics of my body to do the job efficiently,

Here are a few things I researched that helped with my birth

King Louis XIV;
I found out a very interested fact about
Louis XIV who made his wife give birth lying down so that he could watch the future king being born, prior to this mothers would squat or stand up as it’s proven that it is easier to labour in this position, this new trend became popular not only for the women but for the convenience of the doctors as delivering babies from mothers lying on tables is much easier to do than if they are squatting, standing, or on hands and knees too. Sometimes, doctors today will even tell us that it is for our own safety that we delivery on our backs, but is that true? I thought that women for years were having no problem squatting so if it was good enough for them then it was good enough for me.

Animals and their habitat;
Another thing I researched about was how animals give birth, essentially we are animals and we can learn so much from our 4 legged friends, when an animal is giving birth the environment they surround themselves in are essential to the labour process, take this for example, when a sheep is due to start labour, it will leave the rest of the flock and find a quiet corner of the field where there are no distractions, it almost always happens at night so there are no bright lights to startle them, if a predator happens to take advantage of the sheep, the labour process will slow down as adrenaline kicks in and fear will stop the labour going any further until they find a safer place. The main thing an animal desires is a quiet, safe and comforting surrounding

Water birth;
A French doctor came up with the concept of water birth in the early eighties, his theory was that water can act as a counter balance to adrenaline, it soothes the muscles, therefore relaxing you, another interesting point he makes is that water births take away most, if not all intervention from doctors, leaving you in control of your body, I don’t know about you but I know my body better than anyone else, especially a doctor, the third point he makes on the subject relates to the environment in which the new born enters the world, for nine months it’s being surround by water and to bring the child out into the same surrounding it is used to stops the baby becoming distressed, as you have probably seen on my birth, Eivissa came out very quiet and relaxed( if you haven’t seen it, log onto the channel 4 website or check out the link on my page)

I found all the above very interesting and very true of what our experience can be like, I too wanted a quiet, serene atmosphere, low lighting and to feel safe and without fear. When your body is in it’s most relaxed state then your state of mind will follow, often after we get home from a stressful day at work, a nice hot bath will make us feel relaxed and clear our thoughts but if we come home from work and talk about our stressful day, then we remain stressed and tense, apply this situation to child birth, if we approach it in a calm, relaxed state, free from fear and focused on the end result then we are never going to give the opportunity for adrenaline (which acts against our body in the berthing experience ) to occur and make the process difficult or even slow.

The start
Late Thursday evening I felt what seemed like a period pain, I had a dull back ache that would work it’s way round to my front in waves, the feeling came and went perhaps 6 times in the next 24 hours but didn’t really cause me any concern,

7pm; Friday evening was when the dull aching turned into mini contractions, each one lasting 15 to 30 seconds and happening every 9-15 minute, you know that it’s a contraction because it feels like the wave you get when you have a period pain, the first few hours of these were fine and I was even able to go to McDonald’s( I reccomend chicken Mayo burger, small fries and sprite) perfect labour snack, hehe!

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In labour in McDonald’s

10pm; the contractions became more intense, I was still able to move around but once a contraction came I found laying on the bed with my knees against my chest eased them. I called the hospital at this point and told them my symptoms and they advised that it is the early stages of labour and to stay home and keep relaxed

2am; contractions coming hard and often, every 3-5 minutes, decided to speak to my cousin in America who just had a great birth, she told me to focus on one spot in the room, to imagine my body was floating, letting each contraction wash over me, this exercise was brilliant and really helped me focus. I called the midwife again just to let them know my progress and we both agreed that should stay at home as long as I could.

5am; decided to have a bath, played some really soothing music and was softly singing songs to my tummy.

9am; I got to the point where my contractions were every 5-6 minutes consistently, the feeling was very intense and at times took me off my balance, I called the hospital and we all agreed it was time to come in.

The contractions continued as I travelled into hospital, Danny drove and was keeping me calm and relaxed,
I think it’s very important that your partner is in tune with your wants and desires, he knew what I wanted and the experience I was hoping for, if your both pulling in the right direction then if one is struggling in an area then the partner is there to pull you back up. Danny knew my birth plan inside out so if for whatever reason I wasn’t in a state to say what I wanted then he knew what was going to be best for me! As we entered the ward they put our microphones on and directed us to the water birth suite which thankfully was free. Once inside, the midwife asked to examine me internally just to see how far dilated I was, I was fine with this as it gave me an indication of how far I’ve got to go,
I laid on the bed and my surprised midwife informed me I was over 4cm dilated, she started to fill the birthing pool( takes about an hour to fill) and I decided to keep active and walk around the birthing suite, I found that during contractions I felt most comfortable sitting on the toilet, weird, I know, but it worked
The birthing pool was ready, the water is the same temperature as the womb and needs to be kept at this temperature, I kept active in the pool, standing,sitting, squatting, dancing, anything that felt comfortable.

Throughout my labour I wanted to have music playing and Danny wanted to be connected with me so we shared an iPod and listened to some soft soothing gospel music. Danny was amazing at encouraging me, he knew that his support to me was invaluable and that his positive words were helping me to stay focused on the goal!

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I kept my breathing controlled and found that listening to music helped me keep a rhythm, I didn’t let myself have any freak out moments as I wasn’t going to slip out of my zone, after 10 minutes of pushing my waters broke( this can happen anytime in labour),it was like a water balloon bursting in mid air, I think me and Danny did a high five! Then the midwife informed my that she could see the crown of my baby’s head and I knew that I wanted to push as my body was telling me to do so, through out my labour the midwife didn’t intervene in any way, only to check my heartbeat after a contraction, when I told her I was ready to push, she said go for it, after my first push I asked if the baby was going to come out of my bum, I was convinced it was going to come out of there but she assured me that it wasn’t, the midwife told me that the head was visible and to give a big push, 2 pushes later, the head was out and I only needed another 2 pushes before Eivissa was fully out.

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I then took her from the water and laid her straight on my chest and began to cry tears of joy! We wanted to wait until the chord stopped pulsating before Danny cut it, this took about 7 minutes in which time we were able to just stare and admire the miracle that was before us.

The midwife then took Eivissa to be weight and checked and she immediately passed her back to me so I could breast feed her. She must have been hungry as she latched on straight away and started sucking, the bond I felt in this moment was the closest bond I have ever felt to anything in my life, looking down at her, I knew that she was dependent on me to care and look after, she was the image of perfection and the overwhelming love was uncontainable, I was already so proud of her even tho she was less than 30 minutes old!

At the end of the day it’s called ‘labour,’ the very definition of the word means ‘physical work, done by people’, it’s not always going to be easy but the end result is so worth it! I would recommend it to anyone!

What an incredible feeling and perfect experience I had, I thank, firstly, my husband, for standing with me in every single area of the process, for supporting, loving and caring for my wants and needs, secondly I thank the hospital staff, from the tea ladies to the incredible midwives, each and every one of you are angels and last to my closest friends and family who encouraged my wants, even if at times they didn’t understand them, they still believed in me!

Some of the books I read were
‘Childbirth without fear’ by Grantly Rick-dick
‘Birth Reborn’ by French obstetrician Michael Odent
‘Supernatural childbirth’ by Jackie Mize

When reading books don’t take everything as a fail proof formula. Pick and chose what u feel suits you and apply it to your life. Every experience, person and baby is different but what you can learn from books can be amazing

Baby gender reveal

7 Jun

For my second baby I wanted to do something a little different. I had heard about ‘baby gender reveal parties’ that had become popular in America. I watched a few youtube videos of couples finding out what sex their baby was by cutting a cake or opening a box of balloons and I thought what a brilliant idea, a perfect way to celebrate the new baby on the way.

So on the day of our 20 week scan we asked the sonographer if she would write the gender of our baby on a piece of paper and seal it in envelope so me and my husband wouldn’t see. To which she said ‘no, against policy’. Oh no!, our brilliant way to find out the sex of baby was going to be ruined. We did a lot of begging and the only alternative was to get someone we knew down to the hospital within an hour then they would be willing to tell them so they could write it in the envelope. The thing was I knew my mum and sister were away for the day. So I needed to find a friend and fast.
Our solution? Ask a stranger in the hospital reception to pretend to be my mum! After a failed attempt at that, I started praying ‘lord, send me some one who could do this for us’ well God must have heard my prayer, because at that moment in walked our good friend Tom, I couldn’t believe it. He was more than happy to do it for us, in fact he said he felt like a God parent. We now had our sealed envelope and headed straight to the balloon shop so they could fill our box with pink or blue balloons.

We asked our guests to come wearing the colour they thought the baby would be (pink for girl or blue for boy). I opted for blue whereas Danny chose pink as its always been his wish to have two little girls. We gave Eivissa the choice of a pink or a blue outfit and she picked out pink which didnt surprise me as she kept saying girl and pointing to my tummy.

Team pink or blue?
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The box was sealed and ready to be opened!

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The big reveal, we kept our eyes closed!

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IT’S A GIRL!!!!!
Seven pink balloons floating into the air. So happy!

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Tom, who already knew was wearing black, but then had pink underpants hiding underneath, Haha!
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More girls in the family, Yey! Me with my Mum and sister

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Click here to watch
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